I'm a freak who might be worse ever more.

After the med adjustment, I felt the new treatments made me feel better. I was more stable with myself, less emotional....but...again...I still want to take my breath away :)

I just finished Jeffrey Dahmer's series on Netflix. I didn't want to mention him about how good or bad he was, it's just about something in my guts that made me feel like.... umm... to kill someone or something like the world would be a better place with less humans.

I know it's extremely terrific for what I am thinking, but I can't help with this. I was trying to hint my therapist to think about how much evilness I could be or what I could have done in the future with these feelings, so he could give me some pieces of advice or lock me in somewhere for a while. But my messages were may not clear enough, so I still spending my hopeless life in this crowded world.

I should not tired of being alive.

However, I hope to die soon :)